I'm considering getting a Vince Neil tattoo

I really am. (Not of his face, obvs).

M: Randy Rhoads’ Sister To Release Commemorative Wine - LOLOLOLOLOL :D

J: immortalised in wine! she's stolen vince's thunder!

M: hahaha that's true, altho i think he might have picked tequila. still...

J: i thought any alcohol would do.
that being said; i think vince has enough alcohol in his system to preserve him for a year after death ;)

M: hahaha pickled vince :)))) i imagine thats not far off the truth tho :/

J: > pickled vince
:D :D :D :D
i think really, his ashes should be mixed with the cement for a new steak house being built XD

M: VINCE NEIL BAR AND GRILL - 2 for the price of one tequila shots!
srsly, what better way to commemorate him? either that or open up a strip joint, but they already did that. altho vince already has his steakhouse too :)))) he needs a strip bar and grill :D

J: he needs a fucking casino!

M: thats a GREAT idea :) in fact, they should just give him a residency in vegas or something :))))

J: The key to Vegas :) vince'd love that

M: omg they could have a ceremony with showgirls and everything - vince would wear a horribly loud hawaiian shirt, smile at the women, mention how "proud" his daughter would be of him right now.....

J: does he actually have his own brand of alcohol?

M: i think he has some kind of tequila?



I was right. He does have his own brand of tequila...

He's the one they call Dr. Feelgood

M: VINCE NEIL Cancels Plans To Promote Tequila In Cayman Islands - he got drunk somewhere else instead?

J: bad tummy ;)

M: ooooooops :)

J: that sucks tho, i was hoping he'd do it :(

M: yeah me too :( i gasped aloud in sadness when i saw it :(

J: it's tragic, you should have told [your manager] you were going home early to mourn.

M: omg best reason for a day off work ever :D "I'm sorry [mr. manager man], i just can't work like this - i'm too concerned for vince neil. he's cancelled his tequila appearance in the cayman islands!!"

J: therefore i must cancel my day at work!

M: :D when vince neil dies, i'm gonna take time off work and get WASTED in his honour :)

Metal magic

This time of year you get lists for everything - greatest albums, greatest films, bands, whatever. J and I briefly toyed with the idea of creating our own...and being too lazy to compile this into an actual list, as usual, here's our conversation:

J: see, i think if we did a list, it's be awesome, i think you should do that for leatherman, like a list of most metal moments, but by us...and we know some cool facts! yeah, we hate lists, but we don't hate our own, because we know we're right ;)

M: umm...okay, most metal moments then? that anvil vid is a pretty good one. can't think of anything else off the top of my head? that municipal waste gig at the fighting cocks? i dunno, i'm not that impressed by anything much...

J: vince neil killing razzle :D

M: :O

:)) ooooops!

umm...i think its mean on razzle to put that in there :P

but we can blatantly just add in "everything that vince neil does EVER"

J: off the top of my head;
megaman electrocuting ron mcgovney and then beating up james
the hirax demo
phils bad back
you get the idea - stupid things we love to take the piss out of

M: phil coming back to life, there's one i love :D

the keel right to rock video ;)

J: > phil coming back to life
and douchebag not coming back to life :)
> the keel right to rock video ;)
see, bad-fucking-ass!
see, silly shit we love.

J then completed a huge list of his "most metal moments", which I've copied down here - but with my replies under each as well. As you've prolly noticed before, we do not always agree.

J: Me throwing a Snickers bar at Cradle of Filth... and missing.
M: no

J: Malefic being locked in a coffin to record vocals on Black One
M: maybe

J: The ever changing musical style of Rob Flynn
M: no

J: Keel's Right to Rock video
M: YES

J: Anvil's Mad Dog video (soley for the purpose of the dog turning into Lips)
M: YES

J: Vince Neil killing Razzle (and anything Vince Neil does)
M: only the stuff that vince neil does, i'm not specifically putting accidental drunken murder in there. but now i write it like that, it seems maybe to fit after all.....

J: Anything Seth Putnam does!
M: YES

J: Hirax's 1984 demo
M: YES

J: The Wet Cherry dude from the Decline 2 documentary
M: what?

J: Jim Gillette's hair (and voice)
M: no

J: Michael Angelo Batio's quad-necked guitar (before it was stolen)
M: YES

J: Bret Michaels' mis-spelled tattoo
M: YES YES 1000 times YES

J: This: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2BdP6lI6kqc
M: fucking YES!

J: John Corobi getting what he thought was the name of the new Motley Crue album he was to sing on for them to change the name and release what he got tattooed as a live album with Vince singing.
M: perhaps (it seems like we should just make another list of the ultimately funny stuff in metal - these aren't exactly metal's "greatest" moments......)

J: ODIN! (Odin, Odin, Odin, Odin.........)
M: no

J: The gorgeous Dan Lilker
M: no

J: Scott and Charlie for single-handedly ruining anthrax
M: no

J: Burton C Bell's hairline (and his inability to realise no one likes his side projects)
M: hehehehe yeah maybe :)

J: Dave Mustaine electrocuting Ron McGovney and beating up James.
M: YES

J: Cliff Burton... for being crushed by a fucking bus!
M: YES. twice!!!!

J: Jason's bass from Justice
M: hey!!!! D:<

J: Sebastian Bach forgetting the words to Youth Gone Wild on Nevermind the Buzzcocks
M: no

J: Sleep spending all their major label advance on weed and amps, recording dopespmoker, then getting dropped.
M: no

J: Phil Anselmo coming back to life (and Dimebag not.)
M: yes, but i won't mention dimebag

J: Dylan Carlson's sexy voice
M: NO.

So there you have it. It's more J's list than mine, but then I suffer from an atrocious memory and tend not to remember these sorts of things.

Anyone have their own ideas? I'm sure most of the above won't make it on to the usual "greatest" anything lists - can I entice any of you (all 4 of you who read this) to share your thoughts?

I heart Vince

J: i think i've just found the two best bands ever. you decide!
http://www.metal-archives.com/search.php?string=metal+wolf&type=band

M: i looked at the picture for the 2nd one first - WOLVZ attracted me and i thought nothing could get funnier than that logo with that picture........and then i looked at the first one!!!! that dude with the motley crue sweater or whatever that is is AMAZING

J: yeah, he's the metal overlord :D i LOVE 'taches in metal - fuck beards, i hate them, unless it's on el duce, or me in later years
you can't get more of a Metal name then Metal Wolf... unless you are Metal Law, but not the ML that there is now :)

M: are you going to grow a beard :? :O

metal wolf, he's like the animal god of metal :D

also: http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/VTG-black-MOTLEY-CRUE-SWEAT-SHIRT-dr-feelgood-shirt-M_W0QQitemZ300352477198QQcmdZViewItemQQptZVintage_Men_s_Clothing?hash=item45ee67180e&_trksid=p3286.c0.m14 omg want it so much. i'll bedazzle "I heart vince" on the back

J: > are you going to grow a beard

when my hair finally all leaves this mortal place and i gain bear weight, yes. i will them take over from my master el duce left :D
that top is cool :- only a day left :O

M: i am so bidding on it. i know i'm saving for hellfest but that is iron maiden :D
plus i can bedazzle it, which i'll so do, so people don't think i'm a hipster. how can you not appreciate someone who takes the time and care to write "i heart vince neil" in RHINESTONES?!

J: hey now, i thought you loved tommy lee ;O

Shadows Fail

M: ALL THAT REMAINS Singer Accuses SHADOWS FALL Frontman Of Hitting On His Girl - :D

J: LOL @ arguing in the internet.
take a note from axl, izzy and vince, and just fucking have a fight, no BS

M: internet arguing will only make you look like twats = FACT

J: yeah, they just need to fight IRL :)

M: is that shadows fall dude that wanky dreadlocked dude?

J: i think so, it's all i know about them :)

M: he always wears that green basketball vest thing :)
and they froze my computer once.
i too have now exhausted my knowledge of them :)
oh actually, didn't they play when we went to iron maiden at twickenham? we went to get sweets :D

J: eh, maybe - that proves that they suck :D

M: i kinda think so, to be fair i've never listened to them - i just judge them on that stupid fucking vest :D

J: but i would be willing to put money on the fact that i think they suck

M: me too :)

ANTHRAX Drummer On Working With JOHN BUSH: 'When You Have A Chemistry, You Should Keep It'

M: ANTHRAX Drummer On Working With JOHN BUSH: 'When You Have A Chemistry, You Should Keep It' - which is why you guys parted ways in the first place?? that makes no fucking sense!

J: don't be so harsh, charlie and scott invented john bush you understand ;)

M: that's true, if it wasn't for them, we'd not have music at all. someone should put up statues for them

J: these two clowns just annoy me so much - everytime i hear charlie
banana's name i see jamie jester from get thrashed telling us how
charlie invented the blast beat and i just want to kill myself!

M: charlie banana :) haha charlie always makes me think of legends cup coffee, the benate blend ;D

J: i managed to forget about that... until now.

don't forget megadave's got his fingers in that pie as well :/

speaking of which, that trend of having coffee appears to have faded
away. and it's a good thing too! though i'm sure dave's working on a
hot sauce to put on the market; "rattleheads rasta-style jamacian hot
sauce"... maybe?

M: haha, doesn't dave's wife run it?

omg i can so see him doing that hot sauce thing. they can use it in david silveria's steak houses ;D

J: > omg i can so see him doing that hot sauce thing. they can use it in david silveria's steak houses

that's a match made in heaven right there :D :D

> haha, doesn't dave's wife run it?

yeah, or ex wife :)

M: didn't someone else release a sauce recently?

J: yeah, but i can't think who ;(

i know joe perry from aerosmith has done. vince neil needs to do it :D

M: vince neil definitely need to do some kind of feelgood steak sauce :D

didn't pig destroyer or someone do one? or cattle decapitation? i get them confused as essentially its the same band name. and i think someone else did one too? and ALSO, remember that bar where all the burgers were named after metal bands? :) i just googled it and the article about the bar is on metal sucks, however it's blocked by the stupid wanky work filter ;( *

J: WILDSAUCE!

no wildside :)

it was cattle decapitation and their veggie burgers :)

*I am now not at work. It's a bar in Chicago called Kuma's Corner. The burgers are indeed named after metal bands, from YOB to Darkthrone, Clutch to Judas Priest. Although I'm thinking that asking for a 'Goblin Cock' is akin to requesting a Sex on the Beach in Brannigans. Tee hee.

Dr. Rectum Grinder

M: :D some dude just came into work to see neil - his name is adrian smith :D

J: :D was he really after vince neil?

M: haha, not vince neil sadly :) i wish my name was adrian smith :D

J: it's a normal name though? like dave murray :)

i wish my name was Pope Heathen Scum :D

M: LOL :) demonaz doom occulta :D

J: Dr. Rectum Grinder!